Why is everything a battle?

If someone offered you a really good pepperoni pizza for free, would you argue about it? If you're carrying some boxes and they're about to fall and somebody offers to help carry them, are you going to fight them over it? Why does it seem that many positive common sense ideas and or things we do meet with what appears to be "automatic resistance?"
Today, I did 123. A few people thought I was crazy because everybody knows "you don't do that, duh!" Instead of talking about how to get through it in a positive way, lines are drawn and the feeling of an impending battle takes shape. Instead of saying, "How about doing 13 because that's a better fit." We want to make it a battle. Sure, I could have said what if we try 13. I did ask the so-called expert what could be done. No solution except anger and frustration was offered.
The truth of the matter is that 123 was done and there was absolutely no permanent or temporary damage done to anyone in the least bit. What's the point?
Okay, this is all symbolic to protect the sensitive, but the absurdity of it happens way too often in situations as ludricous as trying to figure out what 123 really means.
I recently finished reading a great book called "The Anatomy of Peace" put out by the Arbinger Institute. The way to peace as outlined in the book begins by treating each other as human beings. Not a novel concept, but one that is practiced so little that it should be a serious concern for all. For example: If someone finds out a friend is of a different political persuasion, they suddenly become a worm crawling on the ground to be stepped on. It really doesn't make any sense at any level, except, perhaps, because we truly have decided that the value of human life can be discounted on a whim.
The book suggests and then gives great steps through which we can reclaim integrity and see one another as human beings and treat each other as such.
It is written in story form, kind of like the Ken Blanchard business and leadership books only in much more detail. It's compelling and changed my way of thinking.
Using its principles allows us to look at conflicts of all levels and find practical, common sense, and compassionate solutions that benefit everyone.
In my opening scenario, when I did 123, a compassionate and human integrity focused response would have been: This is going to present problems. I know you probably didn't think about it, here's what I think we can do to accomplish what we all want...
It requires maybe taking a step back, a breath to gain composure, an attitude of win-win solutions rather than I win-you lose, and with a spirit of compassion and peace working out a solution. Everybody wins and the whole, including the others who are always involved, becomes better for it.
Sorry for a rambling, maybe frustrating, blog but I am extremely frustrated by the widespread attitude of "person as object" toward each other. I have changed and am working to change further because of this book and the impact it has had on my thinking and life. This blog allows me to vent, think,and clear my head so that I can better respond from the perspective of person to person. I ask for yourprayers, good thoughts, etc. not simply to help me do this, but to help all of us do this.
A world full of people treating each other as people may seem like a naive pipe dream, but it's a whole lot better than a world in which we treat each other as objects to be squashed. It just takes a small amount of effort, really.
God bless you all!